FoMO syndrome and its opposite, JoMO, are being discussed and examined more and more often in all kinds of expert articles, studies and research. Its major negative impact on our lives shows in people’s physical and mental health. What does the abbreviation FoMO mean? Why and how should you watch out for this syndrome?
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What do FoMO and JoMO mean?
FoMO syndrome (Fear of missing out) can easily be translated as the fear that something is passing us by. This fear is closely linked to the excessive use of social media, which people are very quickly becoming addicted to.
So as soon as we are disconnected from our phones and computers for a while, we start to fear that we are missing out on something. We don’t know what is happening on Facebook or Instagram right now, and we have no idea whether someone is messaging us at that very moment. And what if they are and we don’t reply straight away? So we quickly reach for our phone, smartwatch and so on, and chase the fear away by checking social media. Does this sound familiar? Then it is quite possible that you have FoMO syndrome.
As a counterpart, the term JoMO (Joy of missing out) was coined, which could be translated as the joy of something passing us by. It is a mindful and responsible approach to using social media and preventing internet addiction.
Why do we feel that we are missing out?
People are constantly connected to everything and everyone, wherever they are. Constant internet access lets us follow updates and news non-stop and devour information. We have access to all kinds of platforms where we can share photos, everyday experiences and sporting achievements, and chat with friends.
Have you ever caught yourself getting motivated to go for a run or cook something just so you could share a photo on Instagram, Facebook or in a chat with friends? If you then hadn’t posted it online, maybe you wouldn’t have gone running that day or made that insta-friendly buddha bowl.
One example says it all
Let me share a recent personal experience. I was chatting with an acquaintance about running and said that I go running about three times a week. My acquaintance stopped short and replied:
“Wait, but I follow you on Strava and there was nothing there.”
And that is exactly how it works: what you don’t share with the online world is as if you never did it.
We are used to knowing everything about everyone, and we are used to giving the online world all the information about ourselves and our hobbies. Every day, hundreds of pieces of information reach us from the media and social networks, and we try to know and keep track of all of them and then add more in the form of our own opinions.
Some people don’t even go and exercise if the app that tracks their physical performance isn’t working. They exercise more for their social media profile than for the good feeling that movement gives them.
How do I know if I have FoMO syndrome?
Which symptoms suggest that FoMO syndrome affects you too? The first ones include feelings of nervousness, a bad mood and impatience. Then comes inattention, an inability to concentrate on work, for example, and a constant urge to check social media. What will definitely tell you that something is wrong, though, are feelings of anxiety, a pounding heart and so-called withdrawal symptoms when you are cut off from the internet.
What can FoMO syndrome cause?
The first area where the effects of addiction to online information can show is worsening relationships with other people. Your irritable mood, lack of interest in the present moment and restlessness will damage your relationships with your loved ones.
Imagine you are meeting a friend after several weeks and for the whole time you are together, their face is glued to their phone, they aren’t fully listening to you and their attention is scattered. Would you want to invite them again next time?
Constantly following fictional and virtual victories and successes (by which I mean the fake and uninspiring kind, such as the number of likes on a new Twitter post) can lower our self-confidence. We feel inferior and unsuccessful compared with others.
It can go so far, however, that frequent feelings of unhappiness and irritability can lead you to suffer from anxiety and depression. A huge part of the population suffers from mental health problems, and FoMO syndrome can be a big part of the mix of causes.
How to protect yourself
The most important thing is prevention. This applies to all illnesses and problems, and it applies here too. Here are a few tips on how to avoid FoMO syndrome and internet addiction in general.
Do you need to know everything?
If FoMO is the fear that something will pass us by, that we will miss out on something, I have one message for you. You will always miss something. It isn’t humanly possible to really know, read and keep up with everything. Try to accept this thought and take it to heart.
This raises the question: do you really need to know everything? Let’s not be sheep and follow every piece of information someone posts online. Do you really need to know where a work colleague had dinner and how many clothes the trainer from the gym bought?
Choose the information channels that are relevant to you and focus on the truly valuable ones that give you only quality information, inspiration or motivation. Filter out the ones that stir up negative emotions, feelings of inferiority and so on.
Value your time
You lose an incredible amount of time this way. Set aside a specific amount of time that you can spend online without feeling guilty. There are even apps that track how many hours a day we spend on social media and warn us when we exceed the limits we have set.
Each of us has the same number of hours in a day, and it is up to us how we use them. Why do you feel that the people around you are more successful? Perhaps it is because they spend their time well and meaningfully.
As Majk Spirit raps: “It’s about what you do when nobody is watching.”
Be an original
Build your self-confidence and values. Nothing can throw you off balance if you are strong, mature and confident enough. Shape and programme your mind so that you feel good. Properly used affirmations can help you with this.
Create something you enjoy and that fulfils you. Focus on spending your time meaningfully. Do you enjoy painting, singing or running? Then do it, but you don’t have to post it on Instagram. Do it for your own joy and pleasure, not for meaningless hearts.
Go after what you want. Setting the right goals and priorities will push you forward, and you won’t have time for mindless browsing online.
Prescribe yourself a detox
Disconnect. From social media, from your phone, from the internet, ideally even from the signal. It is a great detox that both our body and mind need. You can set aside, for example, one weekend a month or one day a week when you disconnect completely and devote time to yourself and your family. Read an interesting book and relax. On this topic, we recommend a book on digital minimalism.
You will never miss out
And trust me, you won’t miss out on anything, even when you disconnect. The truly important information will always find its way to you, and you don’t need to know the rest. The best part of a conversation with my friends is when they say to me, “Haven’t you heard that…”, and I reply with a smile, “I haven’t, but now I know anyway, from you.”
All in all, focus on your needs, values, goals and dreams, and simply let FoMO syndrome pass you by.
