Would you like to know what the people around you are thinking? Learn to read hand gestures and see into other people’s thoughts. This article should help you with that.
Our hands are two tools we could hardly do without. We not only use them for work, but we also use them to express our feelings. These are movements that speak for us without us even realising it. This is called non-verbal communication. But do you know hand gestures and what they mean? And do you know which ones are the most common and the most interesting? That is exactly what the following article is about.
Table of contents
1. Using your hands while speaking
Hand gestures are a normal part of how we communicate. Many gestures do not even need words to go with them. For example, a hand waving in the air with a smile on your face clearly means a warm greeting. And have you ever talked with someone who did not speak the same language as you? Did you notice that you automatically started expressing yourself more with your hands than with your mouth?
If you want to speak well in front of a group of people, you should not forget about non-verbal communication. Body language, and above all your hands and their gestures, help draw listeners into the story, which then becomes more interesting. This helps you hold their attention for longer. Why is that? The right gestures can highlight the key points in a speech, giving the listener something to build on.
2. How do our hands show happiness and joy?
Hands that express positive emotions point upwards or out to the side, away from the body. They defy gravity. Negative emotions make us sink, and it is not only our hand movements that point downwards.
Would you like some specific examples? When we get a happy surprise, we jump for joy and raise our hands. Or when our favourite wins, we cheer and raise our hands above our heads. And have you ever noticed that when you are in a cheerful mood, your hands feel light, as if they were floating? This is down to the positive energy flowing at that moment through your body.
3. Why do people touch themselves when answering questions?
It is a sign of lower self-confidence and uncertainty at that moment. By touching their own body, a person is not trying to draw attention to that part of the body, but to calm themselves down. Typical examples are running the hands along the thighs, or stroking the hand, the arm or part of their clothing.
On the other hand, a confident person does not touch themselves while answering and speaking. Their hand gestures happen in the air and help to paint a better picture of the story. An angler will use hand gestures to prove to you that the fish was thiiis big.
4. What are we saying when we touch our collarbone?
Have you ever been stressed and felt unsure of yourself? This hand movement usually happens during tough job interviews or unpleasant conversations. And how does it go? First you touch the opposite shoulder with your hand, then you slide down to the collarbone and start rubbing your hand back and forth along it. Holding the palm of your hand against your chest has a similar meaning.
All touching and repetitive movements release stress and tension. And for some people, a hand placed on the chest or collarbone can act as a barrier (protection) against an unpleasant situation.
5. Interlaced fingers with thumbs up or down
Interlaced fingers with thumbs pointing up or down are two gestures that look very similar, but they express opposite feelings. A person who is speaking usually has their fingers interlaced in their lap or resting on the table. So what are we actually saying with this gesture? If our thumbs point upwards to the sky, we believe what we are saying. It is also a sign of positive emotions.
By contrast, thumbs pointing down signal lower self-confidence, or negative feelings towards the topic being discussed. These two gestures are very changeable and during a single conversation they often switch depending on our emotions and how sure we feel.
6. Hands on hips
Hands on hips is one of the most common gestures. Did you know that this movement can express two opposite attitudes and ideas? Once again, the only difference is the position of the thumbs: in one case they point backwards, in the other forwards.
When someone has their hands on their hips, their thumbs pointing backwards and their elbows sticking out to the sides, they are showing dominance. The person has some problem or a different opinion, and so they are on guard. They will probably soon launch into a discussion in which it will be very hard to persuade them otherwise.
If the thumbs point forwards, the body language is different and expresses curiosity. Picture a street performer surrounded by a small crowd of curious onlookers. Some of them are bound to have their hands on their hips.
This gesture can also be seen in mums standing nearby and watching their little ones at the playground. A thought runs through their heads: I wonder what my boy will get up to this time? And they automatically put their hands on their hips with their thumbs pointing forwards.
7. Shoulder movements
It might seem that the shoulders barely move and show no signs of non-verbal communication. But that is not the case.
- One raised shoulder: with this gesture, the person we are talking to signals that they have doubts. It also suggests lower self-confidence. If someone slowly raises one shoulder, tilts their head towards it and looks you in the eyes, they are instead showing affection and interest.
- Both shoulders raised high: this signals doubt and uncertainty. The person is actually trying to hide beneath their raised shoulders.
- A quick shrug of the shoulders: you can see this in a person who does not know the answer to the question they have been asked.
8. Elbows spread out on the table
A person who has their elbows spread wide on the table is showing us their confidence and self-assurance. Usually the person is not aware that they are sending us this signal. If their elbows are pulled in close together, it means the opposite: uncertainty or a sense of threat. The topic of conversation often changes, and the position of the elbows changes with it. For you, this can be a good indicator of the other person’s feelings and confidence.
The whole arms can also be spread out, or rather stretched out, this time on a sofa. With this territorial behaviour, a person is also showing their confidence. Notice that it is mainly people in senior work positions and high social positions who sit with their arms spread wide like this. If someone of higher status enters the room, there is a good chance the person on the sofa will lower their arms.
9. Crossed arms are not a clear sign of disagreement
Crossed arms have several meanings depending on the situation. To judge correctly how a person with this gesture is feeling, you also need to watch the other body language signals that go with it. Non-verbal communication of the eyes and the whole face says a lot.
- Crossed arms and hugging yourself: this gesture is comforting while waiting, or it has a calming effect. A classic example is crossing your arms while waiting a long time in a queue.
- Crossed arms also help with self-control: crossing our arms helps us keep ourselves in check when we are restless or angry. With this movement we keep our hands busy and gain better control over them. In this case, the person has a hostile expression on their face.
- A sign of displeasure: when we see a person we find unpleasant or do not like for some reason, we may cross our arms over our stomach. Secondary signs are a tense face and feet pointing away from that person.
- Crossed arms can serve as a protective gesture: we are trying to protect the vulnerable area of the stomach. Along with the crossed arms, the person has more tension in their arms and their face shows emotional discomfort.
And what about other hand gestures?
Unfortunately, there is no room for them here. Just for fun, try to think about and count how many hand gestures you make in a single day. There are a lot, aren’t there? If you would like to know all the gestures, I recommend reading a book on non-verbal communication.
And which hand gestures do you use? Did you find them in this article? Or do you think you do not gesture at all? We would love to hear your opinion, so tell us about it. Well-developed gestures can have a very positive effect on people and create an excellent first impression.
