Psychopathy is a fascinating subject if you have never met a psychopath, and a frightening one if you have. People who feel no empathy or other emotions are not just characters in films. An estimated 1% of people have marked psychopathic traits, and many of them can be productive members of society. But is it possible to have a normal relationship with them? And what if something goes wrong and the psychopath seeks revenge?
The short answer. A person with marked psychopathic traits takes revenge mainly where they know you, through gossip, manipulating the people around you, persistent contact or surveillance. An effective defence is usually to keep contact to a minimum, communicate in a factual way and in writing, write everything down and rely on the people who know you. In Czechia, long-term stalking that may cause a justified fear for your life or health is the criminal offence of dangerous stalking (Section 354 of the Czech Criminal Code, trestní zákoník); ask local police or a lawyer about the rules where you live. You can get help from a local crisis or domestic abuse helpline (in Czechia: the White Circle of Safety (Bílý kruh bezpečí) helpline 116 006, free of charge, day and night). If you are in immediate danger, call your local emergency number: 112 in Europe, 911 in the USA and Canada, 999 in the UK (in Czechia: 158).
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How many psychopaths are there in the world?
Psychopaths are more likely to be in prison than other people, but most of them are not in prison. There are many people who have no conscience or feel no empathy and still take part in everyday life as normal. So it is quite possible that you have already met someone like this.
Psychology does not deal only in extremes, so psychopathy is also a spectrum, not a trait that someone either has or does not have. According to a frequently cited estimate, full psychopaths make up about 1% of the population. For example, according to the Czech Statistical Office (Český statistický úřad), Czechia had roughly 10.9 million inhabitants at the end of June 2026, so there this would be roughly 110,000 people. However, Ronald Schouten, a psychiatrist at Harvard Medical School and co-author of the book Almost a Psychopath (written with James Silver), estimates that people with milder, so-called subclinical psychopathic traits make up at least 5% and, according to the upper estimate, as much as 15%. That is enough for you to meet someone like this during your life.
The exact figure depends on how psychopathy is measured. A meta-analysis published in 2021 by Ana Sanz-García and colleagues in the journal Frontiers in Psychology summarised 15 studies involving 11,497 adults. It estimated the overall prevalence at 4.5%. However, when measured with the PCL-R, which is considered the gold standard, it came out at only 1.2%, while with questionnaires people fill in about themselves it was 5.4%. Prevalence was higher in men than in women.
They may be Machiavellian manipulators at work who care only about getting to the highest possible position. Bad friends and girlfriends who drive you mad, sometimes entirely on purpose. Or a past partner who manipulated you just to get what they wanted. But not every manipulator is a psychopath. How manipulation shows up in a couple is described in the article on the most common types of manipulation in a relationship.
What does it mean to be a psychopath?
Psychopathy is a set of personality traits in which a person shows a profound lack of empathy for the feelings of others. Not being empathetic, however, does not mean they do not understand the concept. Symptoms of psychopathy include, for example, extreme egocentrism or a willingness to engage in immoral or antisocial behaviour for short-term gain. Psychopaths tend to be narcissistic and impulsive. And because they lack empathy, they may see other people as objects that can be used on their way to a goal.
The psychopath and how they experience feelings
Research on people with psychopathy describes a specific lack of emotions such as anxiety, fear and sadness. However, they feel emotions such as happiness, joy, surprise and disgust much like most people. So although they may have trouble recognising fearful or sad faces and respond less to threats and punishment, they can recognise happy faces and respond positively to rewards, although they need bigger rewards than other people to trigger the same response.
They can stay calm even in tense situations
Psychopaths can easily charm people and are able to take risks with confidence. They tend to be ruthless and goal-oriented and can make bold decisions, which can sometimes show them in a good light. According to some authors, this allows them to succeed even in environments such as Wall Street, senior management or politics.
We should also note that their lack of emotions such as anxiety and fear helps them stay calm in frightening situations. A 1993 study of 54 prisoners by Christopher Patrick and colleagues showed that people with psychopathy have a weaker startle response when they see something unpleasant. In other people, the startle reaction becomes stronger when looking at unpleasant pictures, but not in them. While others do not know how to calm down, psychopaths react less intensely in situations that cause fear.
Tip. How can you tell whether your boss is a psychopath?
The emotional pain of psychopaths
However, the picture of their lives should not be black and white. Psychopaths can also suffer emotional pain, for various reasons. Like anyone else, psychopaths want to be loved and cared for. This desire, however, often goes unfulfilled, because it is not easy for others to stay close to them.
Psychopaths are at least sometimes aware of the effects of their behaviour on others and may be genuinely saddened by their inability to control themselves and fit into normal society. The lives of most psychopaths lack stable social networks or warm, close bonds with other people.
Is psychopathy a diagnosis, and how does it differ from sociopathy?
Psychopathy is not a separate diagnosis in the usual medical sense. Diagnoses are often coded according to the International Classification of Diseases ICD-10 (in Czechia: MKN-10, managed by the Institute of Health Information and Statistics, Ústav zdravotnických informací a statistiky). The closest is code F60.2, dissocial personality disorder, which explicitly also covers antisocial, psychopathic and sociopathic personality. It is described as disregard for social obligations and a lack of feeling for others.
The American diagnostic manual DSM-5 uses the term antisocial personality disorder. It can only be diagnosed in a person over 18 years of age who already showed conduct problems before the age of 15. Psychopathy is a narrower term. Most offenders who meet the criteria for psychopathy also meet the criteria for antisocial personality disorder, but most people with antisocial personality disorder are not psychopaths.
The words psychopath and sociopath are often used interchangeably in everyday speech, and neither is a separate diagnosis. Psychologist Martha Stout, who worked for over 25 years on the clinical faculty of Harvard Medical School, writes about sociopaths in her 2005 book The Sociopath Next Door, but she describes very similar people without a conscience. So for your own defence, the difference between the terms matters little. A similar type of behaviour is also discussed in the article what a sociopath in love can do to you.
In this article, we therefore use the word psychopath as an everyday term for a person with marked psychopathic traits, not as a diagnosis. Do not label anyone around you a psychopath on the basis of one article or test. Only a psychiatrist or clinical psychologist can assess this. If someone is hurting you, you do not need to wait for a diagnosis. You can defend yourself straight away.
How does a psychopath take revenge?
Psychopaths are not always vengeful. But when they do take revenge, they can be incredibly inventive. They may snoop and become obsessed, and many do so by legal means. They often do it in such a way that their methods can seem legitimate even to the most experienced people.
The author of an English-language blog post, who describes himself as a psychopath, writes that he constantly observes how people act and think, and when someone hurts him, he can easily work out how to pay them back. Because, in his own words, he does not become emotionally attached to anyone, he has no difficulty hurting people. This is one person’s account, not research, and his diagnosis cannot be verified.
The main problem when a psychopath takes revenge, then, is usually that they know how to get to you. If they know you, they often have a good idea of where and how to strike, and they can take steps to make sure their actions hit you where it hurts.
Retaliation can easily drag you down to the level of the person who hurt you.
Upbringing, people and environment shape a person, and anyone who grows up among ruthless people may adopt some of their patterns. However, vengefulness in itself is not a defining feature of psychopathy. You will not find it among the 20 items of Hare’s PCL-R assessment tool. Instead, the list includes callousness and lack of empathy, lack of remorse, manipulation and pathological lying. And these traits are what make such a person’s revenge cruel and without regard for the victim.
What a psychopath’s revenge can look like in practice
The form revenge takes depends on how you know each other and what the person knows about you. At work, it is more likely to involve gossip, taking credit for your work or turning managers against you. In personal life, it may involve blackening your name with mutual friends, family or a new partner. The attack often looks innocent and is easy to explain away to others.
The Czech victim support organisation White Circle of Safety (Bílý kruh bezpečí) lists the signs of dangerous stalking as repeated attempts at contact through letters, phone calls, messages or gifts, threats, hanging around your home or workplace, damaging property and misusing personal data. If the revenge moves online, the article on cyberstalking will give you advice.
Another common weapon is manipulating the people around you. A person seeking revenge may play the victim and convince others that you are the problem. How to recognise these phrases and tricks is explained in our overview of a manipulator’s phrases and tactics. If you start doubting your own memory, also read our article on gaslighting.
How to expose a psychopath
Of course, you cannot immediately label everyone who has treated you badly a psychopath. But be sceptical of people who try aggressively to win you over, and of those who are nice to their superiors but nasty to the people below them. Notice how these people treat waiters or others in a lower position.
Some people seem able to “sense” a psychopath. In 2002, researchers J. Reid Meloy and M. J. Meloy analysed 584 questionnaires from mental health and criminal justice professionals in 12 US cities, publishing their findings in the Journal of Threat Assessment. Of the professionals who had interviewed a psychopathic offender or patient, 77.3% described some physical reaction during the interview. Skin reactions such as goosebumps were the most common, followed by nervous feelings in the stomach, muscle tension or a pounding heart, while shortness of breath was the rarest. The authors see this as a hint, not as proof. So take your intuition seriously as a warning, not as a diagnosis.
Why an online test cannot identify a psychopath
Psychopathy is assessed by a trained professional, most often using the PCL-R, a tool created by psychologist Robert D. Hare. It has 20 items, each scored 0, 1 or 2 points, so the maximum is 40. The assessment is based on a personal interview and information about lifelong behaviour, for example from records. The threshold for psychopathy is 30 points in the United States and 25 in the United Kingdom.
Online tests and lists of traits therefore cannot replace a diagnosis. At most, they show which behaviour worries you. In any case, you do not need a diagnosis to protect yourself. What matters is how the person treats you. Specific warning signs are summarised in the article 12 signs of a psychopath.
How can you protect yourself effectively when a psychopath takes revenge?
If you are looking for a way to destroy a psychopath, we probably do not have good news. Destroying a psychopath is not just difficult. It also brings you down to their level and sets you on a path that will be long and painful. And do not forget that they often have the advantage. They have a lifetime of practice. You can still protect yourself once the revenge has started, but the sooner you begin, the better.
That does not mean you cannot defend yourself at all. If a psychopath appears in your personal life, cut off contact wherever possible. The problems this relationship will bring you are definitely not worth it. Do not assume you will manage to have a normal relationship with them, or that you can handle or change them. However, if it is a partner you live with or someone who is stalking you, plan your exit first with a local crisis or domestic abuse helpline (in Czechia: 116 006 or 116 016), as described in the section How to get rid of a psychopath safely.
Whether or not you can avoid them (at work, for example), these five steps will help.
1. Limit contact and do not play their games
Do not play their games, because they have more practice at them than you. Trying to beat them with their own weapons is more likely to pull you in deeper.
In her book The Sociopath Next Door, psychologist Martha Stout of Harvard Medical School advises resisting the temptation to compete with a seductive sociopath, to outsmart them, to analyse them or even just to spar with them verbally. You should certainly not underestimate a psychopath. Besides lowering yourself to their level, you are diverting your attention from protecting yourself.
If you have the option, get rid of them and remove them from your life. It is often the simplest route to a life with fewer worries.
In The Sociopath Next Door, Martha Stout sums it up by saying that the best protection is to avoid such a person and refuse any contact or communication. If that is not entirely possible, get as close to complete avoidance as your circumstances allow.
2. Set boundaries and keep communication factual
Accept that with some people it simply does not work. Rather than looking for a way to save a psychopath, notice how they put pressure on you, for example through guilt or your need to please, and set firm boundaries there. Keep communication with them short, factual and in writing as much as possible. This is described in more detail in the section How to communicate with a psychopath.
3. Build a good reputation and strong relationships
Build a good reputation and good relationships with the people around you. Psychopaths often spread misinformation and lie about anyone who might pose a threat to them. At some point, that could be you. Make sure that when it happens, your reputation and relationships are strong enough to survive the attack.
True friendship also matters if a psychopath appears in your private life. If people close to you warn you about someone, you should listen to them.
4. Write everything down and keep evidence
Psychopaths tend to be competitive and aggressive personalities. They want to win, and keeping one step ahead of them will be very exhausting. So write down specific situations with the date, time and names of witnesses, and keep messages, emails and screenshots.
The Czech victim support organisation Bílý kruh bezpečí advises victims of stalking to record and document each incident. Such records are useful with an employer, the police and the courts, even when the revenge looks innocent on the surface.
5. Use legal routes and professional help
When revenge escalates into stalking, threats or defamation, you do not have to put up with it. Which of these are criminal offences and how to report a crime is described in the section When revenge is a criminal offence.
You can get advice from a local helpline for victims of crime (in Czechia: Bílý kruh bezpečí 116 006, free of charge, 24 hours a day), and women experiencing domestic violence can also call a local domestic abuse helpline (in Czechia: ROSA 116 016). You will find further contacts in the section Where to turn for help.
How to communicate with a psychopath and what to do in an argument
When contact cannot be avoided, for example because of work, shared housing or children, keep communication short, factual and boring. Respond only to what needs to be resolved, without emotion, long explanations or apologies. The less emotion you show, the less material you give them for their next attack.
You will usually not win an argument with a psychopath, because they are not interested in the truth but in your reaction and in having the upper hand. Do not rise to provocation, do not make threats and do not retaliate. End the conversation with a calm sentence saying you will follow up in writing, and walk away. How to do this is also described in the article ignoring a manipulator.
Have important agreements confirmed by email or message and save them. Notes with the date, time and names of witnesses are useful if you need to defend yourself with your employer, the police or the courts. How to set boundaries and stand your ground is explained in the article learn to say no.
When a colleague or boss takes revenge
At work, keep records of specific situations and save emails. Take the problem to the person’s manager, the HR department or the trade union. If it is bullying that breaches employment regulations, you can submit a complaint requesting an inspection to the regional labour inspectorate (oblastní inspektorát práce), including online. The labour inspectorate is required by law to keep the identity of the person who submitted the complaint confidential.
You will find a specific procedure for dealing with bullying in the article bossing and mobbing: how to defend yourself against workplace bullying. How long-term contact with such a person affects your mental health is described in the article what a toxic person around you does to you.
When revenge is a criminal offence
A lot of revenge happens in a grey area: it is unpleasant but legal. Some acts, however, are already criminal. Anyone who persistently stalks you, meaning they threaten you or your loved ones with bodily harm or other harm, seek your proximity, follow you, contact you persistently, restrict your usual way of life or misuse your personal data to get to you, is committing the offence of stalking (nebezpečné pronásledování) under Section 354 of the Criminal Code (trestní zákoník).
The condition is that such conduct is capable of causing reasonable fear for your life or health, or for the life and health of your loved ones. The basic penalty is imprisonment of up to one year or a ban on activity. A stricter penalty applies if the offender stalks a child or a pregnant woman, uses a weapon or acts together with at least two other people.
A threat to kill, cause serious bodily harm or other serious harm that may cause reasonable fear is the offence of dangerous threats (nebezpečné vyhrožování) under Section 353. Anyone who spreads false information about you that could seriously damage your standing among other people, for example harm you at work or disrupt family relationships, may be committing defamation (pomluva) under Section 184. A higher penalty applies if it is done online or in the media.
Less serious insults and ridicule are a minor offence under Section 7(1)(a) of Act No. 251/2016 Coll., on Certain Minor Offences (zákon č. 251/2016 Sb., o některých přestupcích). Petty acts of spite can be the minor offence of malicious conduct under Section 7(1)(c)(3) of the same Act if someone uses them to deliberately disrupt civil coexistence. You can also defend yourself against interference with your honour and privacy through a lawsuit for the protection of personality under Section 81 of the Civil Code (občanský zákoník), asking for the person to refrain from such interference and, where appropriate, for financial compensation. If you are being hurt by someone you share a home with, it may be abuse of a person living in a shared dwelling under Section 199 of the Criminal Code (trestní zákoník). Its signs are the focus of the article 10 signs of psychological abuse.
You can file a criminal complaint with the police or the public prosecutor’s office, either in person or in writing, and you should explicitly ask for confirmation that you have filed it. Bring your evidence, such as screenshots, messages, emails, dated notes and the names of witnesses. The article on free legal advice centres explains where to find free legal help.
Where to get help
You do not have to face this alone, and you do not need to be sure that a crime has been committed. You can call these helplines just for advice.
- A local helpline for victims of crime and domestic violence (in Czechia: Bílý kruh bezpečí 116 006, available 24/7 and free of charge).
- A local domestic abuse helpline for women (in Czechia: the ROSA centre helpline 116 016, available 24/7 and free of charge).
- A local crisis helpline for adults in crisis (in Czechia: the psychological first aid helpline Linka první psychické pomoci 116 123, available 24/7 and free of charge).
- A local helpline for children and young people (in Czechia: Linka bezpečí 116 111, for children and students up to the age of 26, available 24/7 and free of charge).
- 158 for the police, 155 for the emergency medical service and 112, the single European emergency number, if you are in immediate danger.
In Czechia, if you are threatened by someone you live with, the police can evict them from your shared home for 14 days (Section 44 of the Police of the Czech Republic Act, zákon o Policii České republiky). This period cannot be shortened, even with your consent, and if you apply to a court for an interim measure, the eviction lasts until the court’s decision becomes final. An intervention centre then offers free help (Sections 60a and 72(m) of the Czech Social Services Act, zákon o sociálních službách). Elsewhere, the police and courts may be able to issue protection orders; ask local police or a lawyer about the rules where you live.
The court decides on an interim measure under the Special Court Proceedings Act (zákon o zvláštních řízeních soudních) within 48 hours. It can order the violent person to leave the shared home and its surroundings and to refrain from meeting you, from unwanted following and from harassment. The measure lasts one month and can be extended. You can apply for it even without a prior eviction, for example if someone is following or harassing you in an unwanted way.
How to get rid of a psychopath safely
When you are leaving someone like this, prepare a safety plan with the help of a local crisis or domestic abuse helpline. Among other things, the Czech ROSA centre advises avoiding places you used to go to together, changing your routes, arranging with people that they will call the police if your partner turns up, and going to the police if you are being followed.
If you have children together, the Czech ROSA centre recommends informing the local child protection services (in Czechia: oddělení sociálně-právní ochrany dětí) and the people who are in contact with your children, for example at school or at after-school clubs. After that, communicate about the children in writing and stick to the facts, and save everything.
Long-term stress caused by revenge or stalking can affect your sleep and concentration. If you are struggling to return to normal life, see a psychologist. The article when to see a psychologist and what to expect describes what such a visit involves.
